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Cat-in-a-Box

Like many Cats, I frequently receive offerings from The Amazon: crinkly mice, tasty treats, copious puffy nuggets. Cats deserve these lovely gifts in great numbers. However, humans, there’s an easier way to earn our moderate approval.

 

The Answer: Boxes.

 

The most versatile things on earth, boxes serve as lairs for ruminating, hideouts for ambushing, supplemental beds for napping. The possibilities are endless!

Sometimes your Cat needs time to herself. But what to do when her lair’s in another room? A well-placed box makes an acceptable alternative. Flappy tops obscure her from view, so she may ruminate, uninterrupted by humans craving affection. When done contemplating her own beauty, or plotting Total World Domination, your Cat simply slinks out of the makeshift sanctuary and resumes her day. So convenient!

When toys and treats get boring, stalking is great for whiling away those long minutes between naps. Every Cat must keep his or her stalking skills sharp! The box provides a perfect hideout for frightening nosy dogs or pouncing exposed ankles. Quieter than paper bags, boxes enable Cats to lurk, undetected, for as long as we like. Enhancing the element of surprise, boxes elevate the thrill of the stalk to a whole new level.

Humans, never underestimate your Cat’s need for places to nap! As mentioned in my earlier post, 7 Reasons Why , humans squander prime mischief-making hours with sleep. Worse, they disregard other choice napping locales and designate one spot, in one room, for this inactivity. How wasteful! Cats are much more pragmatic. Superfluous clutter cast aside, any horizontal surface serves as an adequate place to snooze. However, with 20 or 30 naps a day, even Cats in the largest homes are wont to find sufficient options. Enter, boxes!

Every Amazonian offering brings an exciting new way to nap! Deep boxes are secure. Cartons let in the breeze. Cubes, cuboids, the occasional cylinder – your Cat never knows what to expect! And, unless it smells like something you bought for the dog, we are rarely dissatisfied. Even the most challenging shapes are no match for Cats. We are quick to origami ourselves into any boxy configuration, then drift into blissful slumber.

Humans, toys and treats are nice, until they’re boring, lost or eaten. Add to those things a constant stream of new and varied boxes. You’ll earn more moderate approval than you ever thought possible!

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